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Monday, April 4, 2016

The Polar Dance: Bi- or Otherwise (Some Stress Doc™ History and Lessons Learned at the Creative/Destructive Edge)

Here’s an introduction that sheds light on background musings on the final version of “The Bipolar Dance.”  Specifically, the degree to which I myself exhibit bipolar/more cyclothymic patterns – pro and con.  And speaking of revision, we had to reschedule last week’s Reality Radio show on addiction to Tuesday 3/29 at 8:30pm.  See below for details.  Hope you can tune in.
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The Polar Dance:  Bi- or Otherwise (Some Stress Doc™ History and Lessons Learned at the Creative/Destructive Edge)

Staring at a Twelve Step Narcotics Anonymous poster during a Emotions Anonymous meeting, the obvious hit my cortex:  you don’t have to ingest substances (whether alcohol or all manner of drugs) or crave Internet porn to be out of control.  I can be powerless over my own brain chemistry!  On one level I’ve known this for years, taking prescribed medication for clinical/major depression.  (For much of my life, I have experienced “cyclothymia” – alternating periods of euphoric or agitated, high octane hypomania and low to premium grade depression.  Work that allows me to express and share my idiosyncratic, emotionally-sensitive/charged nature helps manage the peaks and troughs.  There’s also a low threshold for sharp spikes in either direction.)

However, I’ve been increasingly aware of a tendency in certain situations – typically infused with sexual, aggressive, or wounded ego energy – to react, not respond.  Feeling triggered, my sense of restraint and boundaries can take a back seat to perceived injury, frustration, and impulsivity.  Alas, this emotionally volatile trio rapidly start fueling and driving…now spiraling “over the edge” intentions and actions.  It’s possible the aggressive fever is a subconscious response to ward off looming melancholia.  And there’s historical perspective.  I’ve worked hard to:  a) accept a family tree weighed down with psychiatric labels all along its various branches and b) overcome a childhood legacy of bullying victim, family secrecy, along with emotional disconnection and intimidation.  A powerful consequence was the swallowing of, no, more often the denial of healthy anger.  Perhaps I have pushed the pit (in the stomach) and (psychic) pendulum too far.

The Double-Edged Dream & Dance

But not only perceived insult, injury, and/or invasion set off the urgent, expansive, and/or aggressive cycle.  Sometimes my amplification is ignited by an encouraging event or startling insight releasing a burst of energy and imaginative possibility, defiance and hope.  Whether logical or psycho-logical, time, events, obsessive noodling, and biochemical release will determine the cyclical course.  For the focused duration my hypomanic eruption somehow allows escape from the gravitational pull of black hole doubt and despair.

Not surprisingly, this capacity to rev up quickly and intensely has adaptive value.  As a motivational speaker, I can go from sitting quietly to rapidly energizing and commanding hundreds.  I recall a former IBM Manager saying she never saw a presenter take an audience from laughter to poignant sadness or reflection…and then back to laughter as quickly as the Stress Doc!  My “passion power” weapon:  playfully or provocatively turning the pain of threat and loss or a sense of injustice (my own and others’) into passion and purpose.  Using “higher power humor” to gently poke fun at my own flaws and foibles often wins over hearts and minds.

And as a writer, the capacity to blend mania and melancholia, to patiently and persistently hyper-focus, to sit and ponder ideas, whisperings, and doubts – my performance angst – has its rewards.  Having learned to tune out and turn inward, observation ensues with the mind’s eye.  Compelled to explore both the light and dark recesses of the heart, I plunge below the surface, retrieving emotional memories and luminous examples.  Swimming carefully through the verbal-visual reefs, I search for mental pictures, rhythms, and rhymes – the missing pieces of my vision (or is it hallucination?  It’s such a fine line).  This inner-directed, hypnagogic state eventually enables the simmering and smoldering to reach organic wholeness.  Ingredients excitedly relate and blend making an extra-ordinary concept-seafood gumbo:  part concentrated-sequential attention and spontaneous-unconscious reverie, part critical thinking along with clever word play; spice as needed with colorful or poignant metaphoric imagery.  And despite this confident analysis, very rarely is the recipe exactly repeatable; it’s unusual for the final product to have a totally predictable taste or texture.

The Challenge and Opportunity of Conscious Delay

But maybe there is something the reactive social being can learn from the self-absorbed word artist, especially the writer’s “Cave” persona, in contrast to the extroverted “Stage” persona.  Suddenly a rhyme hits:  Learn to digest and delay…find half-steps and shades of gray!  Perhaps I can move with more presence, respond at a more reserved pace; not reflexively feel compromised, constricted, or “unmanly” by being tentative, dependent, or subdued.  The challenge:  to gradually embrace uncertainty, and not be so quick to demand an answer or wrap up a problem.  Give up control; grow with the slower flow???  For a time, forsake leading for being observant; be more attentive to others’ needs as well as the overall situational context.  By way of example, despite my railing that the “e” in email stands for escape…perhaps better to send a text or email to inquire if a woman is interested in social exchange rather than call, thereby putting her on the spot…and my ego in the spotlight!  Will I be more boundary conscious?  Must I quickly determine my fate once and for all?  Can this ex-New Yawka become both more and less Type “A”:  Angst-tolerant as opposed to Anger driven?  Stress Doc heal thyself…walk your talk:  Practice Safe Stress!
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Notes on the Poem:  “The Bipolar Dance” identifies some of the larger themes associated with cyclothymic or manic-depressive patterns:  lust, fantasy, and aggression, along with addictive or hyperactive cycling or numbing.  In addition, there’s often creative or spiritual grandiosity and the allure or final option of death – symbolic, glorious, freeing, escapist, or otherwise.  Alas, in a biochemically agitated state, tripping over the fine line between vision and hallucination or creation and destruction is not uncommon.  The poem also illustrates my dance steps – from initial seduction to fiery combustion, from heavenly illusion to disconnection if not disillusion…on the border of the mystical and the delusional.  But perhaps I’m ready to contemplate stepping back from the biochemical edge!
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The Bipolar Dance

Why do I so quickly turn?
A simple gaze…oh, aching yearn.
Drink for the eyes, a closet dream
To fantasize…on Munch’s “The Scream?”
To look and listen ere leap and LEARN
To purr cat-like as hormones burn.

For a heart that sings
The mind will dance
On soulful wings
Of chemical trance.

To have a mind Touched with Fire **
As brain cells .comBust with desire
For red-hot passion, that “reborn” crave…
Now molten steely-eyed tiger brave.
Flames of the Phoenix…arise, aspire:
A Mozart choir funeral pyre?

For a heart that sings
The mind will dance
What karma brings
Just leave to chance.

I am the dope in dopamine
Manic or magic:  False Hope machine
Edging towards Dr. Freud’s obsession –
Tropic of sex, primal aggression
On verdant past that might have been…
For feline virgin on the screen
A mystic vision lies unseen.

For a heart that sings
The mind will dance
My own mood swings
For once, at last…I look askance!

**  Touched with FireTouched with Fire:  Manic-Depressive Illness and the Artistic Temperament, title of a book by Dr. Kaye Redfield Jamison, renowned expert in the field; Jamison links uncommon levels of poetic, literary, and artistic production to acclaimed individuals who grappled with both manic and melancholic brain-behavior patterns, thereby infusing their work with a complex-creative intensity

©  Mark Gorkin  2016
Shrink Rap ™ Productions
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or

Stress Doc & Communications Strategist Reality Radio Blog:
Human Connection in a High Tech World


Tuesday Nights 8:30-9:00 pm EST

Guest Call-in: 646-564-9624
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Change of Date:

Surviving the Heroin (& Other) Addictions:
Reality Radio Podcast # 10, Tues, Mar 29

First order of business:  We have a new name for our show:  Human Connection in a High Tech World.  Inspired by my soon to be published book:  Preserving Human Touch in a High Tech World, we believe this topic connects with all genders, groups, and generations.  Of course, our unique psychological-motivational-communication-organizational perspective, infused with our spirited and thought-provoking, interactive and FUN dialogue and debate remain the staple.

The Stress Doc ™ and the Communications Strategist examine a variety of “substance” addictions, e.g., in school settings, grappling with such issues as:

“Individual vs. Institutional Responsibility”
Healing power of family and community
Bridging technology and f-2-f
How to talk about signs of addiction
Power and possibility of “Peer Self-Help Group
Alternatives to working with the mandated client, and
Challenge of a communicating “individual responsibility” ethos without being judgmental

Hope you’ll tune in.
Mark and Emily
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