A Note of Appreciation: The Vital Intersection of Writer and Reader, Coach and Learner, Performer and Participant

As Thanksgiving approaches, the election hangover momentarily ebbs. (I'm counting on Trump and his minion, along with the counter-reaction, to fuel media explosion-exploitation for periodic transition mayhem.)  During this psycho-political interregnum, I wish to express thanks for the chance to contribute in the face-to-face – individual and organizational – arenas as well as through social media platforms.

The Vital Intersection of Writer and Reader, Performer and Participant

Starting with the digital universe, an unexpected note from a reader helps, once again, solidify my decision to walk my “Psychohumorist” ™ talk along that off-the-beaten, writer's path:  Congratulations on the new book. (Ed. note:  Fierce Longing...Fiery Loss:  Relearning to Let Go, Laugh & Love; on Amazon.]  You may not remember me but we met a few years ago. Unfortunately, after our meeting I became ill and have been in and out of the hospital for the last 2 years. Your emails are always refreshing and help me appreciate the gift that God has given you and encourage you to keep up the good work. God bless.  DH

Feedback from readers – pro and con – thankfully, is one of the forces that keep this mind obsessively grinding and, occasionally, trail-blazing.  As I once penned:

For the phoenix to rise from the ashes

One must know the pain

To transform the fire to burning desire!

It was only after my third decade that I sensed the urge, the desire, and the potential to be a writer with a home-grown, meaningful, and playful voice.  Now, after three + decades evolving and honing my craft, first and foremost, I write to harness emotionally intensity, to construct an imaginative bridge between the conscious and the subliminal, to drill for psycho-kaleidoscopic memory, with its fading images yet also sudden bursts of pulsing and streaming color.  I labor at the keyboard (and sometimes still rough out initial ideas by hand), to find and shape my own "word artist" anima, not just a persona, to conjure and express an idiosyncratic conceptual frame, to transform complexity and confusion into a multi-threaded yet singular creative tapestry.  Ah…to choose the right word, to sculpt that compelling metaphor, to grapple with rhythm and rhyme.  Consider this illustration by one of my heroes, Mark Twain, American humorist and man of letters; his cleverly crafted, truly inspiring conception of “wit”:  Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation!

Finally, I write to stand up to and laugh at all those critical, self-doubting voices in my head, that forever emerge as I'm nervously posturing and positioning myself in the new project starting blocks. And despite the anticipatory angst (or, perhaps, because of the same) ...I feel the least need to justify myself when immersed in creative writing.

The Learning, Sharing, and Performing Arenas

But this word artist must thrive on both page and stage (or, at least, a coach’s chair).  And for this, too, I am grateful.  First, as a writing and speech coach, helping an immigrant lawyer's pursuit of both the American Dream and supporting his advocacy message of human – social-educational-economic-political – rights for individuals caged in caste-based systems, especially in South Asia.  In the process, I am better understanding the challenge of the immigrant experience, especially giving up “the once big fish in a smaller pond” status. Sometimes it’s nice to be in the shadows while supporting another’s struggle to recreate the limelight…feeling like an “uncle” as much as a coach.

And a recent stage appearance, as a Leadership Consultant and workshop-retreat leader/facilitator for the internationally-based Leadership Institute of Embry-Riddle Aeronautics University.  I will be expanding my training role with their management and supervisory staff.  I have loved brainstorming and working with the Leadership Institute Team, assisting on webinars and providing university personnel with an in-the-flesh "Stress Doc (Retreat) Experience" (to quote the Leadership Director).  Helping audiences “Get FIT – by making programs FUN-Interactive-Thought-provoking – creates a symbiotic and synergetic learning laboratory.

Back to the social media arena, I'm also grateful for the congratulations and "likes" by so many Linked-In contacts to my profile posting of the newly evolving Embry-Riddle position.  In fact, here was my note of acknowledgement:

Thanks...appreciate the congrats. Looks like I'm starting to fly around as a leadership consultant.

Hope you are also in flight. Anything cookin?  Still would love to partner. Best wishes and good adventures. Mark

See recent leadership retreat testimonial (below) for international Aeronautics Univ. (FYI, just been asked by Embry-Riddle Aeronautics U./Leadership Institute, HQd in Daytona, FL, to do another "magical" leadership retreat with university managers, this time at their satellite campus in Prescott, AZ.)

Testimonial

Embry-Riddle Aeronautics University/Leadership Institute, Daytona, FL (Global HQ), "Building Power through Conflict," One-Day Leadership Retreat for 30 managers/supervisors

Nov 3, 2016

Mark Gorkin took our leadership group on a discovery tour of how conflict brings power. He demonstrated and we practiced the art of “letting go of the rope” – that frequent occurrence of two people standing firm on differing sides of an issue. They both keep pulling until one pulls the other over – never a good solution but most often the outcome. The art of letting go gave our participants another great tool for creating a win-win. Mark has a way of creating an environment of safety where people feel free to express themselves – it was a true bonding experience!

Rich Pernell, MS, CPF, CPM
Director – Organizational Development & Design
Human Resources
Embry Riddle Aeronautical University
Daytona Beach, Fl 32110-3900
(386) 226-6995 voice
------------

Rita Avinger, Ph.D., SPHR, SHRM-SCP
Director, Leadership Institute
Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University
Voice: (386) 226-7004

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Closing Thoughts

So, I am thankful for the opportunity to share my complex, ever evolving self with others and to be enriched and enlightened by head-and-heartfelt interaction – whether as writer, coach, or group facilitator.  I am grateful for my small yet meaningful victories, as I recover from the partnership breakup tsunami and rebuild a life.  To quote mid-19^th century American transcendental philosopher, Ralph Waldo Emerson:

" To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children...to leave the world a better place...to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded. "

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Perhaps I have “succeeded” more than I realize, or give myself credit.  Fittingly, a final share which has often induced a knowing laugh from others.  Best wishes for a graceful holiday season.

Practice Safe Stress for the Holidays:
The 4 "F"s of Holiday Friction

While many associate the holidays with Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol, and its theme of gaining and sharing the holiday spirit, the opening lines from A Tale of Two Cities may have even more relevance:

It was the best of times, it was the worst of time
It was the season of light, it was the season of darkness...
It was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair.

Like Dickens, I too have tried to capture the complexity of the holidays; if not through a great novel, then with my one classic holiday joke.  I realized with all this talk of pressure during the holidays, I needed to distinguish between "Holiday Blues" and "Holiday Stress."  Now holiday blues is the feeling of loss or sadness that you have over the holidays when, for whatever reason, you can't be with those people who have been or are special and significant.  And holiday stress...is when you have to be with some of those people!

Email stressdoc@aol.com or send me a message on LinkedIn or Facebook to receive the entire essay.

Mark Gorkin, MSW, LICSW, "The Stress Doc" ™, a nationally acclaimed speaker, writer, and "Psychohumorist" ™, is a Leadership Consultant for the international Embry-Riddle Aeronautics University, HQd in Daytona, FL.  Mark is also a founding partner and Stress Resilience and Trauma Debriefing Consultant for the Nepali Diaspora Behavioral Health & Wellness Initiative.  A former Stress and Violence Prevention Consultant for the US Postal Service, he has led numerous Pre-Deployment Stress Resilience-Humor-Team Building Retreats for the US Army.  The Doc is the author of Practice Safe Stress, The Four Faces of Anger, and Preserving Human Touch in a High Tech World.  Mark’s award-winning, USA Today Online "HotSite" – www.stressdoc.com – was called a "workplace resource" by National Public Radio (NPR).  For more info, email:  stressdoc@aol.com.