Discovering and Declaring Your Genuine Voice: Lessons for Any Age or Stage – Part II

Beginning to prepare for my Sunday, March, 12 guest sermon debut for the Cedarhurst Unitarian Universalists.  The invitation itself has added to my conception-label of role and voice with the help of my “sister.” Miss Eva added to the litany of nicknames over the years bestowed and self-generated:  Stress Doc ™, Motivational Psychohumorist ™, Shrink Rapper ™, and the latest – “The Sermonator” ™.  (The UU gathering is north of Baltimore; 2912 Club House Road, Finksburg, MD 21048.  Services are from 10:30-12:30pm; http://cedarhurstuu.org/home/;  Contact:  info@cedarhurstuu.org.)  The sermon theme:  “Finding Your Voice at Any Age.”  So, it’s a good time to complete Part II of “Discovering and Declaring Your Genuine Voice.”  The opening segment (https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/discovering-declaring-your-genuine-voice-lessons-any-age-mark-gorkin) explored the meaning of “discovering and declaring your voice” and also outlined the first five Finding Your Voice Lessons:

1.  Confront Your Intimate FOE

2.  Play with a Child

3.  Try Poetry and Pictures

4.  Be Out-Rage-ous

5.  Recognize It’s a Digital World.

Time to ring out 6-10.  P.S.  Would love to meet you on the 12^th.

The Stress Doc’s Finding Your Voice Lessons – Skills and Strategies:

6.  Quietly Listen and Blend the Unconscious and the Conscious.   Discovering your voice begins in the quiet recesses of your unconscious cave-mind.  First you listen for the subterranean ebb and flow:  the confluence of subconscious images and intuitions, shadowy ideas and insights streaming randomly and/or rhythmically from the psyche, heart, and gut.  Then, after a while, your conscious mind comes into play, akin to slowly awakening from a dream state.  Now you ponder or, as likely, mentally meander through the compelling imagery that survives the unconscious to conscious transition.  Turning over the mind-body fragments, feeling some tension as you look for Lego-like connections among the discrete, kaleidoscopic bits of data, until the psychic path fades out or…Aha!

7.  Envision a “Cutting Edge” Voice.  Building on #6, let me illuminate that unconscious-conscious-creative path by drawing on parts of the “Introduction” from my recent e-book, Preserving Human Touch in a High-Tech World.  In the early ‘90s, living in DC, I was invited on a radio show hosted by an African-American woman to talk about stress.  We hit it off; upon discovering she had some connections to the music industry, I sent her a bluesy/rap-like verse penned a few years earlier, while living in N’Awlins.  Here’s the opening:

The Burnout Boogie

Well I got the burnout boogie

My mind just wants the snooze

Well I got the burnout boogie

Guess it's time to sing the blues.

(Chorus)   'Cause I'm all burnt out

                 And I'm full of self-doubt

                 All I want to do is shout

                 And baby, just get the hell out.

Now the boss says, Do this project!"

And you know I'd like to please

But I'm feeling like a reject

And I'm down upon my knees.

Well I got the burnout boogie

So I guess I must refuse

Well I got the burnout boogie

Man, I need to take a cruise.

(Chorus)

Rap was starting to catch on big-time.  In addition, she was also promoting a beauty contest, and I volunteered to write a thematic anthem – “The Electrifying Lady.”  It wasn’t selected, but got serious consideration.  (They were confused by my line, “She's a sister and a brother.”  Guess when it comes to male/female psychological ambidexterity and/or gender possibilities I was just ahead of the times.)  Here’s the opening stanzas and chorus:

The Electrifying Lady

The Electrifying Lady
The hottest in the land
Her look will drive you crazy
Her mind is in command.

The lady's smart and sassy
So don't tell her where to go.
She's not your little lassie
This Black Goddess stops the show.

     'Cause Electrifying Lady is shock energy
     For a mind and body surging to be free.
     Now Lady Electric just don't know her place
     That Ms. E. L. is hyperspace.

©  Mark Gorkin   1992
"Shrink Rap" Productions

[Email stressdoc@aol.com for the entire lyric.]
~~~~~~~~~~

In the meantime, a month or so passed without a word about my “Boogie.”  So, I called the radio host.  She had sent it to a rap group in LA who liked it…but then the LA Riots broke out.  She hadn’t heard anything.  I guess it became “The Burnt-Up Boogie!”

From Twilight “Aha!” to Out of the Rapper Closet

To put some closure on this meandering tale…one morning in bed, in a dream-like state – neither sleeping nor awake – I start musing:  “Mark, you’re a therapist, you’ve been a university professor…what are you doing trying to write rap lyrics?”  And then, percolating up from dawns early depths, pushed to consciousness by identity conflict…a flash out of the contradictory haze:  “Of course, you’re into Shrink Rap.”  And eventually, a paradoxical insight:  A new voice may emerge from a novel vision of self!

And with the early ‘90s concept, a number of works quickly followed, with a Shrink Rapper twist.  After hearing the original “Stress Doc’s Stress Rap” ™, an African-American lawyer-friend noted:  “Oh, so you’re into ‘Aristocratic Rap.’”

Finally, talking of finding a new voice, it took some “trial and terror” to basically lose all inhibition and sense of proportion.  With an evolving entertainer’s mindset, I added a Blues Brothers hat, black sunglasses, and a black tambourine.  Now I started performing my homegrown rap during “Practice Safe Stress” speaking programs and workshops.  To this day, with a tad more method than madness, I don my ensemble, one by one, while slyly acknowledging a secret identity.  (Naturally, I share the suspicion that the audience might prefer my keeping this secret in the closet.)  Alas, too late…”The hat’s out of the bag.  I'm pioneering the field of psychologically humorous rap music and as a therapist calling it, of course, 'Shrink Rap' ™ Productions."  Predictably, there's an audible groan from the audience.  And my response:  "Groan now.  We'll see who has the last groan." And then, “The Stress Doc’s Stress Rap”:

When it comes to feelings do you stuff them inside?

Is tough John Wayne your emotional guide…

To…

Now I made you feel guilty, you want to confess

Better you should practice “The Art of Safe Stress!”

In truth, initially, mouths are agape.  Midstream, people are laughing knowingly, spontaneously providing rhythmic backup and, by the end, hands are engaged in energetic applause.  Of course, as the clapping subsides, I get in the last word, declaring:  “I’ve been doing this long enough…I know when an audience is applauding out of relief!”

A Closing Musing:  A twilight vision crystallized the edgy Shrink Rap concept, placing me on an ever-

evolving, “Four ‘C’-ing Psychohumorist Path-Voice”:  Seeking to be Creative-Courageous-Comedic-Compassionate!

8.  Reflect on Nature.   The recesses of the mind and being somewhat “out of your mind” help cultivate a newfound voice.  However, so too when outside the mind’s normal chattering state, that is, when meditatively and then poetically absorbed in the wonders of nature.  Consider this passage from my essay, “Gospel of a Country Road,” based on a mid-October, overnight retreat to a remote mountain village in Helvetia (“Little Switzerland”), West Virginia:

And speaking of the brain and the senses, for me, the color of the leaves also evokes an overpowering chemical reaction. When bathed in sunlight, the shimmering waves of lemons and apricots and orange-cranberry hues overwhelm the logical left-hemisphere. All I can do is gaze and sometimes gasp. And from a distance write:

The forest as the artist/Trees willowy and bold
The brushstrokes of the branches/Leaves afire red and gold.
And then God-like fingers/Stream down from above
Solar rays caress you both/A touch of nature's love.

[From my "Mountain Vision" lyric.]

While not brilliantly breathtaking, the colors have a more subtle, a more mature beauty this year. (Maybe it's a projection of a fifty-year-old psyche ;-)

And when the color disappears and night descends, then the other big picture show takes center stage. Walking in the cool, clean, crisp mountain air, down another country road, beyond the last remnants of man-made lighting, reveals the truly majestic and miraculous mystery. As wonderful as cyberspace is, it can't compete with the real thing.

9.  Allow Yourself to Be Challenged.  Accepting an unexpected assignment or the challenge around a performance task, or emotionally stretching outside one’s relationship comfort zone, can be the impetus for a new or expanded voice.  For example, recently, a friend strongly suggested that I transform my anti-bullying Power Point Slide Children’s Song (to the tune of the camp favorite, "B-I-N-G-O") into a lyric for adults.  Actually, many adults, upon hearing or hearing about my child’s' version say, in essence, bullying is not just for kids...It's rampant in the workplace!

My initial “adult version” angst was brought on by self-comparison:  would I be able to generate a worthy companion piece to my child’s lyric?  Eventually, I followed my own risk-taking advice:  Aware-ily Jump In Over Your Head! and “Strive to Survive the High Dive.  Would love to hear your thoughts on my meeting the challenge.  If inclined, feel free to share...maybe slip it under someone's door! ;-)  P.S. If you'd like to see the original Bully Boy/Girl Slide Song, just e-holler.

BULLY Guy/Gal:  A Workplace Variation

[In this version, the four (or five lines) of each stanza are sung with the same melody as in the original.  The same rules apply to the B-U-L-L-Y chorus as in the B-I-N-G-O chorus.]

~~~~~~~~~~~~

At my work, there’s a “big” dude

And Bully Guy’s his name, oh

Blaming me for what he did

Pumps his inflated ego.

B-U-L-L-Y… B-U-L-L-Y… B-U-L-L-Y…

And Bully Guy’s his name, sigh.

Stalking me all down the hall

Controlling is his game, oh

When did “scarcasm” get so cool?

Isn’t this against the rules?

Not when the boss’ bud, oh.

Why does he just pick on me?

The Guy should be ashamed, oh

Is he green with jealousy?

Or just a red bull guy, oh…

B-U-L-L-Y… B-U-L-L-Y… B-U-L-L-Y…

And Bully Guy’s his name, sigh.

Meetings are ruled by his “facts”

There is no room for doubt, oh

Speaking up gets you the axe

Or, he will just storm out, oh.

Just because he makes it rain

All look the other way, oh

While morale goes down the drain

Does money make a hero?

B-U-L-L-Y… B-U-L-L-Y… B-U-L-L-Y…

And Bully Guy’s his name, sigh.

I must learn to take a stand

And overcome self-blame, oh

Not just bow to his demands

Nor play the helpless zero.

I will find one trustworthy

To talk out all my pain, oh

Then stand tall as an oak tree

Or walk away, nothing to say

But with my head held high, oh…

B-U-L-L-Y… B-U-L-L-Y… B-U-L-L-Y…

And Bully Guy’s his name, sigh.

Now I see…the real tragedy

Leaders’ heads in the sand, oh

A virus kills a company

When no one takes command, oh…

B-U-L-L-Y… B-U-L-L-Y… B-U-L-L-Y…

I’ve overcome self-doubt, oh

B-R-A-V-O… B-R-A-V-O… B-R-A-V-O…

I will give a shout, oh

No longer just an also ran

I now am my own wo/man

Cause I got the way hell out, Oh, Yeah!

© Mark Gorkin  2017

Shrink Rap ™ Productions

10. Perceive, Play, Practice, Pilot, and Project.  You might call these “The Five Voice-Performance ‘P’s”:

1) Perceive and be curious about your inner voice and vision

2) Play with it; try out different sounds, shades, and dimensions

3) Practice with purpose:  what will be your agenda, structure, and key objectives

4) Pilot in front of an audience (or two or three)

5) Project your new voice…perceive the feedback…Then repeat the five-voice cycle!

You can find and evolve a voice for just about any age and stage.  Consider these inspiring words of acclaimed medical pioneer, Dr. Jonas Salk:  Evolution is about getting up one more time than you fall down; about being courageous one more time than you are fearful; and about being trusting just one more time than you are anxious.  All I can add is, Amen and women, to that!

Closing:  The Stress Doc’s Finding Your Voice Lessons – Skills and Strategies 1-10:

1.  Confront Your Intimate FOE

2.  Play with a Child

3.  Try Poetry and Pictures

4.  Be Out-Rage-ous

5.  Recognize It’s a Digital World.

6.  Quietly Listen and Blend the Unconscious and the Conscious

7.  Envision a “Cutting Edge” Voice

8.  Reflect on Nature

9.  Allow Yourself to Be Challenged

10. Perceive, Play, Practice, Pilot, and Project

Mark Gorkin, MSW, LICSW, "The Stress Doc" ™, a nationally acclaimed speaker, writer, and "Psychohumorist" ™, is a founding partner and Stress Resilience and Trauma Debriefing Consultant for the Nepali Diaspora Behavioral Health & Wellness Initiative.  Current Leadership Coach/Training Consultant for the international Embry-Riddle Aeronautics University at the Daytona, FL headquarters.  A former Stress and Violence Prevention Consultant for the US Postal Service, he has led numerous Pre-Deployment Stress Resilience-Humor-Team Building Retreats for the US Army.  Presently Mark does Critical Incident Debriefing for organizational/corporate clients of Business Health Services.  The Doc is the author of Practice Safe Stress, The Four Faces of Anger, and Preserving Human Touch in a High Tech World.  Mark’s award-winning, USA Today Online "HotSite" – www.stressdoc.com – was called a "workplace resource" by National Public Radio (NPR).  For more info, email:  stressdoc@aol.com.

Some En-Light-enment for a Dark Age: Two Psycho-Political Parodies

Two psycho-political parodies from The Stress Doc.  Enjoy!

Some En-Light-enment for a Dark Age:  Two Psycho-Political Parodies

At a meeting with Nepali allied health colleagues, all who are American citizens, the impact of this new administration’s pointed messaging was palpable:  Is America still a safe place for who folks who don’t look like the traditional “majority?”  From a female colleague with brown skin and dark hair recently attracting intense disapproving stares in a restaurant (i.e., people assuming she is “Muslim”) and aggressive “go back home” texts/taunts on social media, to people who have no legal-rational reason, feeling wary about walking in public, many of all walks are starting to feel like endangered “strangers in a strange (more repressive) land.”  In addition to attending rallies and making donations, my push-back method is through words.  The first lyric written this week; the second written the night of the Nov. election.  Hopefully, the democratic pen will prevail over the autocratic sword!  The New “R & R”:  Resistance and the Ridiculous!  MG

~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Fairy-Tail Emperor

When it comes to "media facts"

The Donald does not suppose

Nor bothers with smoking gun tracks...

Simply follows his swelling nose

To the bare bottom of "nasty" attacks

From those "fake-sore loser" foes.

Oh Trumpty Dumpty

Do you know what you know?

Oh Humpty Trumpty

How your little nose grows!

Oh Dumpty Trumpty

You'll stretch the truth

As far as it goes…

What will your gang do

To we who oppose?

Staring down protest in the streets

Alone high atop Mount Ego

Zeus-man keeps hurling tweets

Of all that he knows

It's how "The Man" blows

Up his Olympian PRIDE –

He's "not a crook," has nothing to hide

For there is truth in his prose:

One more "Master of the Universe”

Alas, without any clothes!

Oh Trumpty Dumpty

Do you know what you know?

Oh Humpty Trumpty

How your little horn blows!

Oh Dumpty Trumpty

Here's a Russian Red Rose

To help you cover up

That butt naked pose!

Here's a Russian Red Rose

To help you cover up

That butt naked pose!

© Mark Gorkin  2017

Shrink Rap ™ Productions

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

http://www-stressdoc-com.blogspot.com/2016/11/119-have-we-seen-this-before-or-night.html

11/9:  Have We Seen this Before?

(Or, The Night of Broken Dreams)

Reading about the post-election wailing and grief or the counter-reaction of "stop the whining," helped me realize the personal value of my coping option: turning a political lemon into poetic lemonade. Enjoy...or not!

My biggest fear in this election campaign was that Donald Trump was providing a platform for social-cultural hatred, a hatred by a variety of supporters, surrogates, and sycophants.  Such flame-throwing typically targets groups based on race, ethnicity, nationality, geography, gender, sexual identity, and/or religion.  I don’t believe Mr. Trump is a fanatical hater, more a conditional one:  a) when someone rubs his ego the wrong way (alas, this happens too easily), b) when women complain Mr. T has “rubbed them the wrong way” (alas, this happens too frequently), and c) when he strategically or spontaneously bullies or demonizes “the other” to gain supporters and votes and win a “negotiation” or political battle.  I hope my fears are mostly baseless.  I pray (despite being a Jewish atheist) that the new President will resist the urge to Trumpism, to become a dictatorial, Putin-like “strong man” repressing dissenting voices and constitutional rights.  I will congratulate Mr. Trump hardily if he genuinely helps rebuild our infrastructure and the economic options and standing of working-class families.  In truth, many of his other avowed premises and promises frighten me – personally, for our democratic ethos, and for our fragile planet.  So, I will be vigilant.  To loosely quote Ronald Reagan:  warily trust and verify.  Until then…I versify!

11/9:  Have We Seen this Before?

(Or, The Night of Broken Dreams)

Please do not think me dumb

Or even merely craven, yet

Will 11/9 become

Our homegrown 9/11?

Ah, the ironic paradox

The choice of free election.

Have we unleashed Pandora’s Box:

A swarm of white-male venom?

Oh tell me Mr. Trumpty

How do you run on empty?

Oh tell me Humpty Trumpty

How many have you dumptied?

Forgive my taste in history

To look back does no good

Still…a little pre-war Germany

And streets running with blood?

Why am I compelled to rant?

Perhaps a mere sore loser.

Though not a recent immigrant

(More “word artist” itinerant)

For you…does my life matter?

Oh tell me Mr. Trumpty

Why are you so grumpty?

Oh tell me Trumpty Dumpty

How many have you humptied?

“Why are you so paranoid?”

“He will drain the swamp!”

I gaze into the krystal ** void:

One big internment camp!

I do not fear the Mighty Wall

For I will not be barred

But one and all, from grace may fall

When “vermin” are gold-starred. ***

** The choice of the “kystal” spelling is a blend of “crystal” and “Kristallnacht” also referred to as the Night of Broken Glass.   “Kristallnacht was a pogrom against Jews throughout Nazi Germany on 9–10 November 1938, carried out by SA paramilitary forces and German civilians. German authorities looked on without intervening. The name Kristallnacht comes from the shards of broken glass that littered the streets after Jewish-owned stores, buildings, and synagogues had their windows smashed.

Estimates of the number of fatalities caused by the pogrom have varied. Early reporting estimated that 91 Jewish people were murdered during the attacks. Modern analysis of German scholarly sources by historians such as Richard J. Evans puts the number much higher. When deaths from post-arrest maltreatment and subsequent suicides are included, the death toll climbs into the hundreds. Additionally, 30,000 were arrested and incarcerated in Nazi concentration camps.” (Wikipedia)

*** During the Nazi reign, Jews in Germany (and elsewhere, I believe), were mandated to have gold Jewish Stars sewn on their outer garments, to single out and stigmatize them when in public, increasing their chance for ridicule and much worse intimidation.

© Mark Gorkin  2016

Shrink Rap ™ Productions

Discovering & Declaring Your Genuine Voice: Lessons for Any Age or Stage – Part I

Can you really Discover Your Voice at Any Age?  Actually, that’s the title of my upcoming guest presentation for the Baltimore Universalist Unitarian Congregation.  This question of “finding your voice,” has been on my brain’s front burner for several decades.  What does it mean to “find your voice?”  And what happened that we lost it in the first (or last, or anywhere in between) place?  And, most important, how can we recover, uncover, or discover it?

Clearly, a voice can evolve or dissolve at different ages and stages of life.  (And what about the possibility of having multiple or multi-layered voices?)  Mine has had its fair share of “highs and lows,” as well as mute phases…and vocal-verbal-verse mutations.  But first, what does it mean to “find your voice” as an adult, especially when having grown up in a walking on eggshells, “Don’t Talk, Don’t Trust, Don’t Feel” environment?  (DTDTDF is a mantra of the 12-step ACoAlcoholics/Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families program.)  Of course, one can lose their voice in a codependent relationship, especially when sensitive to rejection or abandonment feelings.  We often feel stifled in a “my way or the highway” workplace, especially when questioning our own worth. Or, doubting our ability to break out of “prison” and find a healthier, financially viable alternative…we become resigned and passive.  Conversely, frequent yelling and screaming is rarely a sign of an authentic adult voice; actually, just the opposite:  we are often caught up in a feeling of helplessness and/or humiliation, i.e., childhood/child-like fits of rage.

Defining the Foundation and Discovering the Fountains of Voice

Finding and evolving your authentic voice means being able and willing to identify and purposefully and spontaneously convey in words, images, body movement, etc., honest feelings and memories, ideas and beliefs.  Speaking of images and body movement, one might say that Voice, Vision & Identity interchangeably frolic together and feed off each other in, au naturelle, Matisse-like “Dance of Life” fashion.  Voice, especially, feeds off vision and identity:  a new or expanding self-image potentially frees up self-expressive breadth and depth.  Hopefully, it's an expansion in self-other understanding, not just self-aggrandizement.   For example, once I envisioned the concept of Shrink Rap ™, psychologically humorous – IMHO, en-light-ening – rap offerings began pouring out.

When it comes to feelings do you stuff them inside?
Is tough John Wayne your emotional guide?
And it's not just men so proud and tight-lipped.
For every Rambo there seems to be a Rambette!

(More on the early '90s discovery process in Part II.)  And finally, authentic voice is ever a work in progress, calling on practice, perspective, and, sometimes, patience.  For example, raw honesty without some empathy often reveals more hostility than humanity.

Voice discovery-recovery also involves substance, style, and timing of self-expression, including choosing silence for a time.  Having a vital voice may be fueled by healthy and mature anger; you are not afraid to be “TnT”:  Tough n’ Tender!  Such a voice, without apology, can admit not being sure, yet still be determined to articulate, intuit, or speculate.  “I’m not really clear on this, but right now I must trust my gut and think out loud, to put my cards on the table.”  (And, naturally, you choose which “word cards” to play.)  And your intuition or argument does not have to hold up in a court of law (unless, of course, you actually are on the witness stand).  Finally, having an authentic voice means being open to another’s authentic voice, with the understanding that, “Acknowledgement does not necessarily mean Agreement!”

Now, without further ado (or psychobabble) …Well, almost:  P.S.  Having a real, strong-vulnerable voice, if it means anything, surely involves an ability to poke good-natured fun at one’s own flaws and foibles!

The Stress Doc’s Finding Your Voice Lessons – Skills and Strategies:

1.  Confront Your Intimate FOE.  Projecting your voice involves speaking up, even when feeling anxious.  Don’t wait until you have your thoughts and feelings all figured/sorted out.  For example, have you ever presented an “in progress” idea or hypothesis, and a listener chooses to pounce – discrediting your “finished product” – with “constructive criticism?”  Trust me, this reveals more about his or her temperament (and need to control the spotlight, or a perceived state of threat or envy) than the merit of your viewpoint.

Recovering a genuine voice as an adult begins with “Confronting Your Intimate FOE”:  Fear of Exposure.  If psychiatrist, Ernst Kris, is right, what was once feared and is now mastered, is laughed at, then risking intimate or, at least, more open and self-accepting engagement, just may transform this FOE into a friend – by embracing the Fun of Embarrassment!  And, according to the Stress Doc ™, if not a friend, perhaps a defanged FOE:  What was once feared and is now laughed at…is no longer a master!

2.  Playing with a Child.  Reconnect to and revive early childhood voices by playing with a child.  Of course, when such rediscovery also evokes painful “lost voice” memories, this may be daunting.  Then again, it’s a TIFO moment – Transformational Intimate FOE Opportunity.  Playing with my ex’s three-year-old granddaughter led to a whole new voice arena – writing children’s songs.  For example, Charlotte and I loved to play hide-and-seek.  Somehow, I paired the tune of “Frere Jacques” to my own “h & s” lyrics…and “Where Is Charlotte” was born:

Where is Charlotte? Where is Charlotte?

I’ll find you, I’ll find you?

Is she hiding in the closet?

Is she underneath the blanket?

No, she’s not!  No, she’s not!

I don’t need to tell you how much she loved the eponymous ditty.  (And, of course, you can substitute any child’s name.  In fact, I have created a “Where Is Charlotte” Power Point Slide Song.  (Email stressdoc@aol.com for more info.)

3.  Try Poetry and Pictures.  Akin to playing with a youngster, reread Dr. Seuss, or any favorite childhood book – with a child or simply by yourself!  I especially like Dr. Seuss’ vivid imagery and rhythms and rhymes.  Think of the evocative power of Martin Luther King’s speeches.  My versified orations are hardly so Olympian, still, they do capture attention…and, on occasion, tickle a funny bone.  Consider these boundary-setting yet voice-stretching mantras:

A firm “No” a day keeps the ulcers away, and the hostilities, too!

Do know your limits and don’t limit your “No”s.

One of my favorite workshop exercises is having small groups identify and discuss the sources of daily stress and conflict…and then come up with a group picture that captures the collective stress storm.  Vivid “group art therapy” examples include:  mindless sheep jumping off a cliff and burnout fires raging through a building, dinosaurs stalking a plant with employees scattering in fear and sinking ships surrounded by sharks.  And while the follow-up “show and tell” is filled with knowing laughter, along with the opportunity to risk more candid expression, something else vital is evolving.  Seeing that management can handle the visual and oral critique heightens employee motivation and trust.  Folks are more ready to get down to work on the problems and issues depicted.

A good way to cultivate and test out a voice:  be a little larger and louder, more rhythmic, colorful, and vivid than life!  And now discover that your evolving voice, unlike in childhood or in that dysfunctional relationship, is no longer immediately throttled or stifled.

4.  Be Out-Rage-ous.  While healthy anger can fuel and fire a purposeful and passionate voice, try adding a touch of the provocative and playful to transform “outrage” into the “out-Rage-ous.”  (FYI, “provocative” comes from the French, provocare, to awaken the mind, to arouse curiosity.)  For example, one of the “Three ‘B” Stress Doc ™ Stress Barometer Smoke Signals”:  my take on TMJ – Too Many Jerks!  Or, what do you think of this Psychohumorist ™ lyric?  (And, naturally, when performing live, I let the audience decide where the emphasis on the word “Psychohumorist” goes.)  It’s the closing two stanzas from an early Shrink Rap ™ – “The Self-Righteous Rap”:

And for those who demean with, "Grow up, act your age"
Here's some advice that's worthy of a sage.
While only young once, it's true, however,
You intend to be immature forever.

So, if life's a soap opera: "As the Head Swells"
No need to be walking on those ego shells.
When the righteous start ranting they're all of a kind
The bigger the ego, the smaller the mind!

© Mark Gorkin 1992
Shrink Rap Productions

Pursue “the call of the wild.”  Of course, be prepared for “civilized” pushback.

5.  It’s a Digital World.  Clearly this new digital world allows for unprecedented levels of personal self-expression.  Alas, more quantity than quality, I’m afraid.  And, yes, some attempts at being “out-Rage-ous” leave me “outraged.”  The opposite of courage:  Digital anonymity that facilitates cyberbullying or hostility.  Of course, I have outraged more than a few readers, especially when adding “psycho-political parody” to my “Psychohumorist” ™ Voice.

However, digital technology often compresses one’s focus.  For example, the impact of having to read text on smart phone screens is palpable:  too long = so long!  At least to me, it seems obvious that our text- and social media-driven culture is diminishing attention span and self-reflection.  Along with the dramatic tilt in the balance between the visual and verbal (e.g., computer graphics vs. characterization and plot), a new Stress Doc voice has had to emerge.  Of course, sometimes kicking and screaming.  But eventually, this digital Psychohumorist defers to “The Bard.”  As Shakespeare noted:  Brevity is the soul of wit.  So, I continue to refine a pithy yet passionate, poetic and aphoristic voice, as captured by my “KISS” and “MISS” mantras:

Keep It Short and Smart:  Seek the Higher Power of Stress Doc Humor:  May the Farce Be with You!

Make It Sassy and Surprising: Recovering from Burnout:  Breaking Out of a Hell of a Shell or Don’t Feel Too Sorry for Humpty Dumpty…He Needed to Hit Bottom!

Well, I haven’t quite hit bottom…there are five more steps and strategies for bringing out that true voice.  Until then…Practice Safe Stress!

Mark Gorkin, MSW, LICSW, "The Stress Doc" ™, a nationally acclaimed speaker, writer, and "Psychohumorist" ™, is a founding partner and Stress Resilience and Trauma Debriefing Consultant for the Nepali Diaspora Behavioral Health & Wellness Initiative.  Current Leadership Coach/Training Consultant for the international Embry-Riddle Aeronautics University at the Daytona, FL headquarters.  A former Stress and Violence Prevention Consultant for the US Postal Service, he has led numerous Pre-Deployment Stress Resilience-Humor-Team Building Retreats for the US Army.  Presently Mark does Critical Incident Debriefing for organizational/corporate clients of Business Health Services.  The Doc is the author of Practice Safe Stress, The Four Faces of Anger, and Preserving Human Touch in a High Tech World.  Mark’s award-winning, USA Today Online "HotSite" – www.stressdoc.com – was called a "workplace resource" by National Public Radio (NPR).  For more info, email:  stressdoc@aol.com.

The Art of Rebranding: Discovering Your Vision, Designing Your Voice – Part I

In Part I, the Stress Doc provides an overview of the psychological/social media process that is motivating the stretching of "word artist" wings in new creative skies and arenas.  Part II provides his step-by-step rebranding process.  Enjoy!  MG

The Art of Rebranding:  Discovering Your Vision, Designing Your Voice – Part I

So, I’m thinking about rebranding – both as an overall conceptual strategy, and practically, to respond to a rapidly evolving speaking and writing business/social media environment. Several factors are coming into play:  Professionally, I’m in a state of flux, wanting to explore new presentational arenas for projecting a message beyond my Stress Doc personae, having walked that talk for several decades.  And while still happy to do a rousing Practice Safe Stress ™ program, I’m ready to move in new directions.

I’ve been testing the cyber-blog waters with a more contemporary, streamlined, and byte-sized – tailored to the digital mind and medium – “word artist”/Psychohumorist ™ voice…and the social media feedback has been encouraging.  Then, in the past two months, have been asked to do Spring keynote/speaking gigs for:

1) a local VA SHRM (Soc. of Human Resources Management) – "Keys to Captivating an Audience" as well as,a leader

2) the VA State SHRM Annual Conference (as a 2-hour MegaSpeaker) – "Leading with Passion Power:  Inspiring through Clarity, Courage & Creativity."  And,

3) the Baltimore Unitarian Universalist Congregation as a guest speaker/sermon presenter on, "Discovering Your Voice at Any Age."   (My new nickname, courtesy of my friend/colleague/“sister” Eva G., "The Sermonator.")

A Compelling & Captivating Calling

Is it a stretch to say the Mid-Atlantic speaking universe is telling me to spread the “authentic voice,” “captivating keys,” and “Passion Power” words:  to work with groups and to individually coach others who, in turn, will role model and better inform and inspire their audience?   The overarching yet down to earth learning objective:  “how to” deliver and facilitate a more compelling and captivating, “Get FIT” message – by being FUN-Interactive-Thought-provoking.  In my mind, a speaker, trainer, educator, director, workshop facilitator, and/or coach should also be an orchestra leader, helping individuals, groups, and communities (the entire symphony/company) bring out and synergize their solo and collective best music.

In sum, my personal goal:  to be a 4 "C"-ing role model and messenger, one who delivers speaking presentations and coaching programs, and inspires others to do the same.  Why can’t a leader strive to be a complex-whole individual:  "Creative-Courageous-Comedic-Compassionate?"

In closing, as I contemplate this makeover process, completing the rebranding circuit clearly requires fresh or, at least, reenergized programs, products, or services.  But rejuvenation is also fired by an evolving, if not exploding, individual and/or company vision and voice.  Such a dynamic duo helps forge and illuminate a new identity – to reaffirm one’s unique mix of strengths, skills and strategies.  With revitalized vision and voice, unexplored marketing horizons are within one’s reach.  Time to expand a target audience.  And, naturally, one must explore a variety of live arenas and social media platforms for delivering the goods.  However, before revealing my rebranding Aha! let me try reconstructing key steps of this redesign and repositioning process.

Actually, we will all have to wait for the Part II sketch of the “Top Ten.”  Until then…Practice Safe Stress!

“Top Ten” Steps for Professional Rebranding

1.  Trust Your Constructive Discontent

2,  Noodle on the Implications, Possibilities, and Pitfalls

3.  Expect Some “Thrustration”…Then Incubate

4.  Try an Experiment or Performance Pilot Project

5.  Assess the Results for Next Action Steps

6.  Test the Social Media Waters

7.  Accept Challenges/Criticism to Help You Stretch

8.  Define Your Mission

9.  Develop Your Mottos, Mantras, and Models

10. Unfurl Your New Brand

         

The  IM⁴  PSYCHOHUMORIST ™:  Imaginative Mind x

Informative Message x Inspiring Messenger x Interactive Medium 

Mark Gorkin, MSW, LICSW, "The Stress Doc" ™, a nationally acclaimed speaker, writer, and "Psychohumorist" ™, is a founding partner and Stress Resilience and Trauma Debriefing Consultant for the Nepali Diaspora Behavioral Health & Wellness Initiative.  Current Leadership Coach/Training Consultant for the international Embry-Riddle Aeronautics University at the Daytona, FL headquarters.  A former Stress and Violence Prevention Consultant for the US Postal Service, he has led numerous Pre-Deployment Stress Resilience-Humor-Team Building Retreats for the US Army.  Presently Mark does Critical Incident Debriefing for organizational/corporate clients of Business Health Services.  The Doc is the author of Practice Safe Stress, The Four Faces of Anger, and Preserving Human Touch in a High Tech World.  Mark’s award-winning, USA Today Online "HotSite" – www.stressdoc.com – was called a "workplace resource" by National Public Radio (NPR).  For more info, email:  stressdoc@aol.com.