Laughing in the Face of Layoffs

Laughing in the Face of Layoffs

"How can the person displaced or downsized see both the danger and opportunity in career change or disruption? Can we learn, even, to both cry and laugh at this career crisis turning point?"

To be able to see the comic in the crisis requires two achievements. First we must embrace Charlie Chaplin's penetrating insight: "A paradoxical thing is that in making comedy the tragic is precisely what arouses the funny...we have to laugh due to our helplessness in the face of natural forces and (in order) not to go crazy." And we must come to understand that the supposed ideal position may have been short-circuiting new idea generation: As noted French author and philosopher, Albert Camus, observed: "Once we have accepted the fact of loss, we understand that the loved one [or loved position] obstructed a whole corner of the possible pure now as a sky washed by rain."

And the "possible" includes discovering (usually through deliberation and design) unexpected opportunities and realizing genuine desire and talent. Turning a grief process into a growth process means exploring fresh options and developing new skills. And as the psychiatrist Ernst Kris observed, "What's was once feared and is now mastered is laughed at." (And as the Stress Doc inverted, "What was once feared and is laughed at is no longer a master!")

So are you ready to “laugh in the face of layoffs?” How do you gain this liberating perspective?

Laughing, Layoffs and the Art of Letting Go

Layoffs-the "L-word" is back. Whether framed as "reorganization," "downsizing," or, perhaps, most cutting of all - "rightsizing" – layoffs can create feelings of betrayal, a loss of face and faith, and anxiety about the future. As one woman caught in the throes of her government agency's reorganization exclaimed, "I once had a career path. Then this boulder fell from the sky and crushed it."

People experiencing a layoff need to let go and transform their emotional pain, fear, and aggressive energy into exploration and acceptance. Those going through this grieving often overlook positive facets of their layoffs:

1. Job worry reduction. What a relief, you can finally stop worrying about the prospect of losing your job. Anticipation can be worse than any termination.

2. Less stressful rituals. Not having to set an alarm clock is definitely a stress reliever. How about a ten-minute morning stretch, including some classic yoga positions, to get your mind-body-spirit both relaxed and revved up? (Hey, this routine definitely helped clear up boomer back pain.) You might even be ready for a real daring move -- gradual withdrawal from the morning coffee fix!

3. Mid-Day Meditation. And consider my radical “Old Age" (as opposed to “New Age") meditation technique: I find a quiet place, then close my eyes and chant "N-A-P, N-A-P" for 10 to 20 minutes in the afternoon and/or evening.

4. Family highs. Layoff transition means more opportunity for you and your family to share personal and meaningful interaction. Now there's time for family dinners and in-depth discussions of, for example, the relationship between homework, television, and migraine headaches. (Of course, too much joy with the family too fast can induce culture shock. Don't try to make up in two weeks for 20 years of benign neglect.)

5. Boredom breakout. When we invest much time, energy, money, and/or ego in a position, it can be difficult to recognize or admit it's time to move on. Before the layoff, were you increasingly frustrated, restless, or underwhelmed at work? Well, now's the time to "fireproof life with variety."

6.Transitional vacation time. Make the shift from being "laid-off" to having "time off." Instead of thinking of yourself as unemployed, consider yourself in transition. (Wouldn't you have liked a semester off during college to reconsider direction and options?)

7. Catalyst for Self-Assessment and Self-Discovery. Don't just conduct a job search, first use the free time to do a mid-life and mid-career eval. (Think of it as a three year or 40,000 mile under the hood check-up.) Are there aspects of your mind-body health that you have neglected? Perhaps it’s time to join a “Y” or start an exercise routine; maybe find a “walking buddy.” Are there significant relationships in need of repair? Or are there any toxic people and situations from whom or from which you need to separate?

After this “nuts and bolts” assessment let’s get more creative. Explore these self-discovery questions: What are my true talents, interests, passions? What do I really want in a career/position at this juncture? What is no longer acceptable to me; to my family? Remember, anxiously rushing into jobs or judgments usually confines people to less creative and meaningful paths. So here's my prescription: Take an incubation vacation to rejuvenate the mind-body-spirit connection and to hatch new perspective.

8. Turn Reconnecting into Networking Opportunities. Now’s the chance to spend time with people you care about and who care about you (especially folks you can laugh with). You might even try catching up with those on your “to call” list for half-a-year. Transition is both a nurturing and networking opportunity. Friends and former colleagues or associates are, to use Malcolm Gladwell’s phraseology from the The Tipping Point, potential “connectors” – people who just might be able to productively pass your name along the job search nexus.

9. Existential Capitalism (EC). EC is my pioneering philosophy; its source of inspiration (or, if you prefer, desperation) arises from the challenge of not knowing from where your next dollar is coming. Money, of course, can be a cause for worry during this trying transition, but wouldn't it be nice to simplify your life a bit? Now is the time to get in touch with wanderlust or bohemian desires. Live on the edge. Paint. Write poetry. If you can't move to Montana, become a freelance consultant. Consider part-time work or even volunteering to get your foot and mind in the door.

10. Seek or Create Support. Find a job support group to help you update your resume, practice interviewing skills and especially for commiserating with fellow seekers and sufferers. Common tears often sow uncommon laughter. If your company doesn’t have such a resource, see if they can start one. Or explore such a possibility with your local paralegal association. I’ve know individuals who during previous economic downturns started a job seekers network at their church or synagogue.

But perhaps the most important take home, don’t be afraid to ask for help, both informal and professional (especially if the ratio between tears of sadness and tears of laughter is way out of balance). Please, don't be brought down by false pride; even the great van Gogh regularly got money from his brother and Thoreau would routinely escape Walden Pond for his mother's Sunday dinner. (It's true.)

Pursuing a genuine, fulfilling, and creative life that's respectful of one's essential talents, nature, and spirit is a challenge. But there's no better time than transition time to take it up. So explore and remember: We're not human doings, but human beings. Learn to laugh at the difference. And, finally, seek the higher power of humor: May the Force and Farce Be with You!


Mark Gorkin, MSW, LICSW, "The Stress Doc" ™, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, is an acclaimed keynote and kickoff speaker and "Motivational Humorist" known for his interactive, inspiring and FUN speaking and workshop programs. In addition, the "Doc" is a team building and organizational development consultant for a variety of govt. agencies, corporations and non-profits and is AOL's "Online Psychohumorist" ™. Mark is an Adjunct Professor, No. VA (NOVA) Community College and currently he is leading "Stress, Team Building and Humor" programs for the 1st Cavalry and 4th Infantry Divisions, Ft. Hood, Texas. A former Stress and Conflict Consultant for the US Postal Service, the Stress Doc is the author of Practice Safe Stress and of The Four Faces of Anger. See his award-winning, USA Today Online "HotSite" -- www.stressdoc.com -- called a "workplace resource" by National Public Radio (NPR). For more info on the Doc's "Practice Safe Stress" programs or to receive his free e-newsletter, email stressdoc@aol.com or call 301-875-2567.